SELF-MASTERY: Are You at The Cause…or Effect of Your Life? – Cheryll Messam

Hi Friends,

Just taking the opportunity to share with you one of the most important bits of content that I have encountered in recent memory. This was shared today by a facebook friend as a journal post. I  just had to ask her for the privilege to use on my blog.  I believe she so beautifully demonstrates:

  • Bravery
  • Wonderful Values Integration
  • Resolve to Live at the Cause of Her Life vs the Effect of Her life
  • Self-Knowledge
  • Self-Mastery

These are all attributes that I wish for all my clients, and all people. We MUST develop our capacity to identify what we truly want for ourselves in every area of our lives. Having done that, we MUST be prepared to clearly articulate our position whenever appropriate. And We MUST stay the course, even when we receive the nod of disapproval from the groups we want desperately to like and accept us. Only then do we live AUTHENTICALLY and with SELF-MASTERY, and ultimately live free and content.

Do let me know what thoughts this post brings to your mind by leaving a comment. Would love to hear from you.


C.A.D Wrote:

DAYS 117& 118: For years I have been hearing, “Do you have any songs? Why don’t you go solo?”, or “You’re so marketable. Why aren’t you ‘out there’?”, or “Are you an artiste? You look like one”. All those inquiries and the pushing over the years have left me uneasy and at odds with myself, and I have been toying with the idea of a solo career for over a decade.

Well, last night I believe I put all that to rest in my heart, mind and soul when I was asked yet again if I had any songs and that I should take the stage and be an opening act. I explained that some people are born to be stars. Some are born to play supporting roles. And the stars are absolutely nothing without those of us who play supporting roles. There is no ‘star’ without those who enhance and uplift their ‘show’.

Not everyone in the entertainment industry has dreams of being a star. I laid it flat out on the table that I have NO such ambitions. I am satisfied doing what I do. I write music, produce music, arrange music, and I also sing, dance etc. I enjoy what I do, and when I am doing it I give my all, but I do not wish to be in the limelight. These are thoughts I have gone back and forth with for YEARS, but in that moment of making those statements last night, I found my resolve. The demands and rigors of being an artiste are not what I desire for my life. I love my family. I love my home. I love BEING home and enjoying my family, watching my son grow, watching my husband excel, being creative at work with my husband. THIS is what truly brings me joy.

Yes, I know there are greater financial gains to be made as a result of a solo career, but money is not all, and money certainly doesn’t rule me. Anyone who knows me well knows this. I’ve turned down many a job over the years out of principled stance, when many thought I was a fool to not drop everything I was doing and run to a studio to do something I was called to do at the very last minute. My life nuh run so.

Anyhow…I will no longer be pushed into a role I do not want to play. All I would be doing is acting. Deep within, I would be miserable and unhappy. I am ok with my supporting role as vocalist, songwriter, producer, arranger. I do not need to be in the limelight, and again have NO such ambitions. And guess what? It’s ok.

In conclusion, I am THANKFUL for this resolve. I have stated my case out loud and I am at peace with it. I hope others will be at peace with it as well. It’s my life. Only I can live it. Wish me well.

Love and blessings to you all. Go with your heart (passion)and not where you are being pushed. You might fall over the edge…

Have a blessed day!



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